(look at that dork)

I got really sick around the start of January, and it stuck around until after I got home. I completely lost my voice and missed 2 days of taking down the Ice rink, slide, and site. I was devastated, actually, because it was less time I got to spend with the people who had all of a sudden become my family. 

I think my actual family was a bit mad with how much I worked over Christmas - I can't work out how I feel about that. I didn't really have a choice, because I needed the money. But also the house was really full and I was taking up someone elses space. It was different to when I arrived though - I didn't spend more than maybe 5 minutes worrying about it. 

Because, and it took me far too long to realise, I was losing out no matter what I did. I'd be leaving people behind no matter what choice I made. 

I have never felt at home anywhere like I did those 3 months in Liverpool. I love the place. Head over heels, up and down, scars and bad rep and all, I adore Liverpool. I adore the people in Liverpool. About 10 days before my flights was due to leave I had a full on crisis over it - I didn't want to leave. I'd had both the Managing Director and Technical Director offer me jobs. I had a group of friends I would miss so so terribly. 

If I had my time again I don't know if I'd come back to Perth. It's same old same old here. In my most honest moments I realise the only thing stopping me from moving away is the weather. There are a few people here that I would miss like a limb if I moved around the world - but again, at my most honest; I think I could do it. I regret leaving, and it took me months to recognise that feeling, as I realised that I'd changed and Perth and the people here had stayed the same. 

So I realise I'm at a cross roads. I need to choose. For now I'l finish my Masters - but I only started it for something to do, really. I'm enjoying it, and it's interesting. My brain is happy in Perth, no matter all the drama since I got back. 

But my heart is firmly in Liverpool. On Duke street at Leaf Cafe, in New Look on Paradise Street, at Chevasse Park by John Lewis in mine and Natalie's little office underneath the Ice Slide. On the Albert Docks at Rebecca's comedy club and in Soho, our filthy little end of the night club, and Santa Chupitos 5 dollar shakes that are neither 5 pounds nor paid for in dollars.